So it's been a stressful week. I faced the results of my first two college tests, in Chemistry and Calculus. I was VERY pleased with the scores, but you know how I am about grades. I had my first college paper due today...in FRENCH. And then I had the typical little nit-picky homework to do for all my classes additionally. I seriously feel as though I have been doing nothing but eating all week long, and pretty much since classes started too.
I've been giving into all sorts of compulsions, left and right. Touching things, skipping over cracks and the darkest parts of floors, organizing and re-organizing everything, stapling my French paper 6 times until it was at a perfect 45 degree angle, brushing teeth and washing hands and invading personal space to fix other peoples stuff...really everything...less the strange ones I have been having to pull the fire alarm at which point I literally run down the hall as far away from it as possible.
Overall...stressful week.
But every week has its end...hence the weekend, and mine started today. I kept optimistic and happy, encouraging everyone of the fact that it is Friday...one week from fall break Friday. And it's homecoming, which is where it all starts.
Our theme is 'Made in the 80's' so pretty much it was awesome. I got all dressed up in an adorable little outfit and went to the pep rally with a few of my hall mates. It was amusing, and I didn't get a t-shirt, but fun all the same. Then the real party started...and by party I mean 80's dance party. I suck at dancing, but there is something about 80's music that makes it alright...even cool...to dance poorly. And so I did. For two hours straight. about 1/2 the time in two inch heels. I got so sweaty and just let EVERYTHING go. I borrowed SWEATBANDS from someone else (I don't know why I accepted the initial offer looking back now.) I moved so much that my outer shirt stretched to 2 times its size. It was so free and fun...just dancing with my friends. I forgot everything and just moved with the beat and screamed along with Whitney Houston until my voice grew hoarse. What could be better?
It's great to have such an ending to a week, even if I do come back to my dorm and realize how disgusting I am and run to the shower before panic can officially set in.
But it was all worth it. =)
vendredi 5 octobre 2007
jeudi 13 septembre 2007
Kindergarten
There is something very important that is often over looked in life. We take care of it all through our infant and toddler years, in kindergarten and maybe even a little beyond that. But suddenly we get to a point, and it disappears. I thought it was gone forever! It was a tragedy, all through middle school and junior high, and especially in high school, when people would think something was wrong when I tried to attempt it. But I was wrong again. It returns in college, it's like an epidemic that takes over in the afternoon and nobody thinks it is wrong or anything else of it. What is this mystery thing? NAPTIME.
It has become such a part of my life here at Allegheny, and I am not the only one who does it. At home, when I would come home from school and want to take a nap, my mother yelled at me that it was a waste of time or thought I was sick. Why is it so wrong? It makes you feel so rejuvenated and you can focus again. It's a sin not to take a nap when you sit down to do your chemistry homework and just pass out on your bed. It's irresistible really, your bed is right there. I know for me it is my primary study spot since my computer leaves no room on my desk.
Despite the fact that nearly everyone I talk to here considers it a part of their daily routine, it is still kind of a hush hush thing about college. The 'sample student schedules' that they send you over the summer leave it out. Nobody really tells you how important it will become for you to take a nap at least 3 times a week.
I think it's great really. Now I got some sleeping out of the way and can concentrate better on my homework.
It has become such a part of my life here at Allegheny, and I am not the only one who does it. At home, when I would come home from school and want to take a nap, my mother yelled at me that it was a waste of time or thought I was sick. Why is it so wrong? It makes you feel so rejuvenated and you can focus again. It's a sin not to take a nap when you sit down to do your chemistry homework and just pass out on your bed. It's irresistible really, your bed is right there. I know for me it is my primary study spot since my computer leaves no room on my desk.
Despite the fact that nearly everyone I talk to here considers it a part of their daily routine, it is still kind of a hush hush thing about college. The 'sample student schedules' that they send you over the summer leave it out. Nobody really tells you how important it will become for you to take a nap at least 3 times a week.
I think it's great really. Now I got some sleeping out of the way and can concentrate better on my homework.
samedi 8 septembre 2007
Where do I go when I have nowhere left to turn?
College is great. I have awesome new friends, my classes are barely hard at all (yet), and I have nothing dictating my schedule. I have a job now, I think I'm gonna be an RA next year, and I feel rather at home. My life at Allegheny rocks, it's great, and I would not have it any other way.
Outside of Allegheny however, things kind of sucked today. Thursday night I had gotten up the nerve to ask my mom if I could go to the Czech Republic in May. After two days of pondering in Churchville, to my surprise, she said YES. Holy wow! How could this happen? I thought she would never say yes to taking $700 of my money and blowing it on a plane ticket! I only had one hurdle to jump...making sure it was all right on the Czech end that I go.
Tyna was ecstatic at the news. Neither of us could believe this would actually happen so soon if ever. Thinking ahead and longing for the days of May where we would reunite and be the best of friends again. Her family was happy for me to come as well. All was good. Then she came back with the worst news ever. Her exams, the big ones that she has to take at the end of her school year that pretty much decide the rest of her life, are from May 21-June 1. My heart was broken, I was shot down, I was depressed...still am really. How could I get through my parents, have them say yes, have plane tickets drop to low rates and work myself up to a level of excitement, only to have this one glorious thing pushed down by something as stupid as this? I think the worst thing is that it CAN'T be CHANGED. Parents say no, I can change it. Plane tickets too high, I fork over another hundred bucks and spend less. But THIS...there is nothing I can do. It's hard to recover from something lie this...getting up on a 500ft pedestal of excitement and joy, then falling flat on my face unable to stop myself before I hit the ground.
The worst part is, now that I know I won't be seeing them in May, they seem so much further away and distant from me. I fear I may never see them again as we enter the adult world and our lives become complicated heaps of responsibility and work. I realized that I have been hanging onto this hope for several months, fully convinced that no matter what blocks I came across along the way, I could get through them with cool persuasion and a drive to show that I can still afford it even while I am at college. Entirely confident in that fact that on May 13 2008 I would be on a plane across the ocean for the greatest reunion of my life to date.
But where am I supposed to go now that the single golden thread of hope has been cut? Who am I supposed to turn to? None of my friends here will understand, to them it will seem like some petty problem that is not worth crying and being depressed over. Their thoughts would be something along the lines of, boo hoo Stacy can't take a trip abroad at then end of the year. How is that a big deal?. My friends at home would barely understand, not wanting to listen to my stupid problem that seems so superficial on the outside. My parents don't understand. My friends in the Czech Republic are probably feeling the same things and I barely ever get to talk to them because we are all so busy. Where do I go when I have nowhere left to turn?
Now I feel really dumb for putting this all here. For some reason, it looks petty and childish and immature that I would be so distraught over this, and it probably is. But explanations unknown, it's hitting me hard. Harder than a freight train and I don't know what to do anymore.
Outside of Allegheny however, things kind of sucked today. Thursday night I had gotten up the nerve to ask my mom if I could go to the Czech Republic in May. After two days of pondering in Churchville, to my surprise, she said YES. Holy wow! How could this happen? I thought she would never say yes to taking $700 of my money and blowing it on a plane ticket! I only had one hurdle to jump...making sure it was all right on the Czech end that I go.
Tyna was ecstatic at the news. Neither of us could believe this would actually happen so soon if ever. Thinking ahead and longing for the days of May where we would reunite and be the best of friends again. Her family was happy for me to come as well. All was good. Then she came back with the worst news ever. Her exams, the big ones that she has to take at the end of her school year that pretty much decide the rest of her life, are from May 21-June 1. My heart was broken, I was shot down, I was depressed...still am really. How could I get through my parents, have them say yes, have plane tickets drop to low rates and work myself up to a level of excitement, only to have this one glorious thing pushed down by something as stupid as this? I think the worst thing is that it CAN'T be CHANGED. Parents say no, I can change it. Plane tickets too high, I fork over another hundred bucks and spend less. But THIS...there is nothing I can do. It's hard to recover from something lie this...getting up on a 500ft pedestal of excitement and joy, then falling flat on my face unable to stop myself before I hit the ground.
The worst part is, now that I know I won't be seeing them in May, they seem so much further away and distant from me. I fear I may never see them again as we enter the adult world and our lives become complicated heaps of responsibility and work. I realized that I have been hanging onto this hope for several months, fully convinced that no matter what blocks I came across along the way, I could get through them with cool persuasion and a drive to show that I can still afford it even while I am at college. Entirely confident in that fact that on May 13 2008 I would be on a plane across the ocean for the greatest reunion of my life to date.
But where am I supposed to go now that the single golden thread of hope has been cut? Who am I supposed to turn to? None of my friends here will understand, to them it will seem like some petty problem that is not worth crying and being depressed over. Their thoughts would be something along the lines of, boo hoo Stacy can't take a trip abroad at then end of the year. How is that a big deal?. My friends at home would barely understand, not wanting to listen to my stupid problem that seems so superficial on the outside. My parents don't understand. My friends in the Czech Republic are probably feeling the same things and I barely ever get to talk to them because we are all so busy. Where do I go when I have nowhere left to turn?
Now I feel really dumb for putting this all here. For some reason, it looks petty and childish and immature that I would be so distraught over this, and it probably is. But explanations unknown, it's hitting me hard. Harder than a freight train and I don't know what to do anymore.
vendredi 31 août 2007
So. I have been doing this college thing for almost exactly a week. And it has been a long week. Orientation became to be one of the most painful things ever and I am glad that classes have started...pathetic I know.
I have met some pretty awesome people, one of them being my roommate Ellen. And my floor...Wannex 3 where we party in the T. I know you all really don't care about my going on about college, but it's amazing. I'm not homesick, I love my classes, and life pretty much rocks right now. I have become pretty good friends with a lot of people in my hall, and I hope I meet other people from other halls now that classes have started.
Speaking of classes...all of them are Monday-Wednesday-Friday classes. I only have my calc class on Tuesday . That means I have Thursday off to do whatever. It's pretty awesome because I can do all of my homework then. So after one day of classes, I already have a ton of homework, but I am alright with that. I am taking 17 credits...Chemistry 110, FS 101, Calculus 160, French 225 and hopefully I made it into the band.
I don't really have anything to say, but I felt like a pathetic loser for coming to college and not updating this. So I am going to find something sweet to do with my Friday night!
I have met some pretty awesome people, one of them being my roommate Ellen. And my floor...Wannex 3 where we party in the T. I know you all really don't care about my going on about college, but it's amazing. I'm not homesick, I love my classes, and life pretty much rocks right now. I have become pretty good friends with a lot of people in my hall, and I hope I meet other people from other halls now that classes have started.
Speaking of classes...all of them are Monday-Wednesday-Friday classes. I only have my calc class on Tuesday . That means I have Thursday off to do whatever. It's pretty awesome because I can do all of my homework then. So after one day of classes, I already have a ton of homework, but I am alright with that. I am taking 17 credits...Chemistry 110, FS 101, Calculus 160, French 225 and hopefully I made it into the band.
I don't really have anything to say, but I felt like a pathetic loser for coming to college and not updating this. So I am going to find something sweet to do with my Friday night!
dimanche 12 août 2007
Big Question
I am faced with an issue.
How do you ask your parents if you can take over $1000 of your own money to fly 5000 miles around the world for one month after your freshman year of college? Money that should be saved for books and other necessities at a time when you should really be looking for and getting a summer job.
But what if this is what I really want to do?
How do you ask your parents if you can take over $1000 of your own money to fly 5000 miles around the world for one month after your freshman year of college? Money that should be saved for books and other necessities at a time when you should really be looking for and getting a summer job.
But what if this is what I really want to do?
jeudi 2 août 2007
Things
Things I like:
- Science
- Green
- Tea
- French, Czech, Language
- Harry Potter
- Mini Coopers
- Men...in special circumstances
- Sewing, Knitting
- Swimming
- Broccoli, Zucchini, Squash
- Organizing
- Clean Sheets
- Numbers Divisible by 2 and 3
- A Multitude of Other Things
- Heights
- Germs
- Onions
- Murder Mystery Novels
- Men...in special circumstances
- Avon Deodorant...it doesn't work
- Technology...we don't agree
- Crowds
- Heavy Metal, Country, Screaming Idiot, Rap Music
- Stereotypes
- Fluorescent Lights, Those Bright Blue Headlights on Cars
- Scions
- Skepticality, Skeptical Situations
- A Multitude of Other Things
- Why People Call Sunscreen "Suntan Lotion"
- OCD
- Czech
- Rap Music
- Men
- Microsoft Windows...nat that I want to
- The Appeal of Canned Squirt Cheese
- Why Old Heavyset Women Wear Watermelon Print Pants
- The Need for Drive-Thru Food
- Betrayal
- Video Games
- My Love For Shoes
- Violence
- A Multitude of Other Things
mercredi 1 août 2007
Better, Much Better
I don't yet know what love is.
That's enough to sum up the day.
It was a good day, and hopefully tomorrow will be better.
Much better.
As good as today was, I believe it is possible to get better.
Much better.
I'm going to be proactive and for the first time
pursue what my heart may be telling me.
Much better.
That's enough to sum up the day.
It was a good day, and hopefully tomorrow will be better.
Much better.
As good as today was, I believe it is possible to get better.
Much better.
I'm going to be proactive and for the first time
pursue what my heart may be telling me.
Much better.
Inscription à :
Articles (Atom)
